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August 29, 2022

A Letter to My First

Dear Holly,

When I was two, my brother, Sam, came into the world. I first met him in my mom’s recovery room at Hinsdale Hospital. I wish I could remember more of that day! I’ve seen pictures — I was wearing a black-and-white striped shirt as I strolled in with my grandparents, and he was swaddled up in my mom’s arms.

When I was eight, I met Jackson, our baby brother. I was a little older and wiser by then, and I knew how to hold him and snuggle him. I loved those days of cuddling with newborn Jack. Just like that, I’d become the proud big sister to two brothers!

Holly, my brothers and I have had our moments over the years. But I give thanks to the Lord for my siblings, and I will forever hold on to the memories I have of us growing up together: bouncing on the trampoline in our backyard, carving pumpkins and trading Halloween candy, swiping Krispy Kreme donuts from our parents’ Sunday morning Bible study, sharing family dinners around the table, negotiating who gets to watch their show on TV, tearing open our stockings on Christmas Day… and so many more.

Very soon, you will meet your sister. Your baby sister. Holly, I cannot wait for you to meet her, to hold her for the first time, to get to know her. A sibling is a gift from above, and you are going to flourish in your new role.

Transitions are never easy, I know. For a while, things are going to look different to you. Our home will be a little louder, a little fuller, a little crazier. I’m nervous for the changes, too!

But Holly, no matter what, I want you to know that you will always be my baby. My first child. My precious daughter. My baby girl.

Your dad and I met you almost two years ago, and oh, how we’ve cherished this time with you. We learned how to care for you and to comfort you. We figured out what makes you laugh and what calms you down. We know all your favorite things: your bunny, your baby doll, your box of crayons, your books. We’ve memorized your expressions for every mood and the way your bouncing blonde curls dry after a bubble bath. We know you so well, and yet, we uncover more about you every single day.

Becoming a family of three has been our greatest adventure yet. You changed our world, Holly. And soon, your world is going to change along with ours as we grow into a family of four. I don’t know what this next part is going to look like, but I am certain that God has His hand over all that is to come.

I love you, darling daughter of mine, to Heaven and back.

❤️ Mom

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